I am from Gateshead, Tyne and Wear UK. I am 29 years old and I have this intesnse obsession to serve a female or females whilst I am dressed as a maid. I long to do household chores worship feet etc and just don't know where to start in finding anyone else who would like to share this with me.
Are there any ladies out there who would like a 29 year old male maid to do there chores?
Wow, it's a shame you don't live near me :-)
Reply:Sounds interesting...hmmm can you come to South East Asia? We ladies need people like you here.
Reply:If you don't know the difference between "there" and "their" - no thanks!
Reply:Well now sit back and wait for answers I bet there are a few who are going to take you up on it.
Reply:Can I smack you on the butt with a riding crop as you clean sans underwear?
Reply:when r u coming
Reply:If you want to do my chores, I would let you. hahaha. I don't care what you wear.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
17 year old maid of honor?
I am getting married next summer and i want to have my younger sister be my maid of honor. The only problem is is that she is going to be 17 at the time and won't be able to participate in the bachlorette party activites and planning that sort of stuff since she will be underage. Has anyone else had an underage MOH and what did you do to be able to let them help out?
17 year old maid of honor?
I know this may be crazy but you don't have to have alcohol at the bachlorette party,
Reply:You can have a maid and a matron of honor - the matron of honor would usually be old enough to partcipate and plan that sort of thing. Or you could ask your other brides maids to collectively plan it since they probably understand your choice of MOH.
Reply:U want to make your younger sister a maid ???.
Reply:Can't there be bachlorette party activities that she can attend? I think it's great that you want her to be your maid of honor and I think that you should let her plan stuff she can be involved in.
Reply:you could do something with just you and your sister, like a night out or a spa day. my maid of honor and my bridesmaids are so different i did something different with each one of them.
Reply:You just don't do the drinking thing for the bachelorette party - booze doesn't make the fun, the company and activities do!
Reply:Technically, the maid of honor is supposed to be an adult. The traditional purpose of the maid of honor is that if you become incapacitated for any reason, then she takes your vows for you. A minor cannot do that.
Also, the maid of honor is the one who is supposed to plan an host your wedding shower. That is a lot of responsibilty (and potentially $$) for a 17 year old.
I would have her be a bridesmaid and appoint someone else who is "of age".
If that is not an option, then I would ask one of your older attendents to "act" as maid of honor even though your sister will be the "technical" maid of honor. Have them include and confer with your sister but put the responsibility of everything on them. OR, as mom to oversee it. (which means she'll end up doing most of it anyway)
Also, since you have given her such an important role in your wedding, it would be kind of mean to plan wedding festivities that she cannot attend. Your bachelorette party doesn't have to be something that she cannot attend. Instead of doing something that requires you to be 21 or older, why not plan a party that she can attend. You can go out with your "over 21" crowd separately. Let her help plan a great night out. Why not have spa day with everyone as a bachelorette party? Or how about a day at the beach followed by dinner and a show or concert? Is alcohol that important that it's worth excluding your maid of honor for?
If you think that much of your sister to make her your maid of honor, you will need to make some adjustments for her. If you don't want to do that, then you need to change her to a bridesmaid.
Reply:If you go on a bachelorette party on a boat (not that expensive) I think your sis can drink!
Reply:Are you set on going clubbing. An option might be to go to somewhere like Dave %26amp; Busters or Jillians - so your sister can come as well. Or start out at someone's house around 7pm and have some fun, then head out around 10, so your sister can at least hang out for a little bit.
Reply:I think you should definitely have your sister as your maid of honor. You could have a special dinner just for the gals and then have a slumber party or something. I know that probably sounds dumb but that's what we did for my wedding. We had so much fun too. We stayed up late, talked about guys, watched old movies, and ate all night long. The next morning we all went to breakfast. It was definitely one of the most fun times I had with all the girls. It was nice to just relax before the big day. :) Good luck with it all!
Reply:Actually I was only 17 when I was my sister's maid of honor. Let her help plan your bridal shower, take her with you to try on dresses. Let her help choose the other bridesmaids dresses and accessories. Obviously I wasn't apart of any Bachlorette party type activities but i didn't mind because i was an important part of everything else.
Reply:I was a JR. Bridesmaid in my sisters wedding when I was 16...I think the rule is if they are underage, it's JR. Bridesmaid...she'll be able to go to the wedding shower, and of course the wedding and reception, but of course the bachelorette party will be off limits unless you are doing a tamer version with dinner, or girls going away to a location.
I'm sure she'll understand.
Reply:My sister is my maid of honor and she is 16. It works out great. She can't go to the batchlorrette party... but she made a great DD for those of us that could. She was and is able to help with everything else and she has done a great job at it. Do no worry about the age. Your sister will understand completely. But she will be able to be there for everything else.
Reply:Not sure on the actual question but i dont think she can be a wittness for the signing of the marriage certificate as she is underage
Reply:Well she can particpate in the bachlorette party when you guys are haning at the hotel drinking and stuff half the fun of going out is the drinking and getting ready before hand with all you girlfriends anyway. I say let her bring a friend and they can drive you to the club (DD better safe than sorry!!) and they can go back to the hotel and hang buy the pool and watch movies while you guys are out. PLus they can go out to eat wih you and all sorts of stuff. If you make a weekend out of it they could participate in everything up until its time to go clubbing.
Reply:My fiance's sister was 16 when she was in her brother's wedding. She couldn't exactly plan the bachelorette party, but she planned everything else like the shower etc. It was fine.
Reply:A good time for all can still be had even though your MOH is underage. She shouldnt be left out because of her age. It could ulimately change your relationship if you two are really close.
I have been part of many wedding events and there have been a few with an underage MOH.
In these cases 2 parties were planned. Usually it was a combined effort with the MOH and the bridesmaid. A shower was planned for the same day as the bachorette party set for later that evening. Or a wedding shower one day and the party the next night.
It still turned out great and hey they received more gifts that way. However for obivious reasons there will be things planned for those of age. But the underage MOH also planned events that did not effect the wedding festivities.
A compromise is possible.
lilac
17 year old maid of honor?
I know this may be crazy but you don't have to have alcohol at the bachlorette party,
Reply:You can have a maid and a matron of honor - the matron of honor would usually be old enough to partcipate and plan that sort of thing. Or you could ask your other brides maids to collectively plan it since they probably understand your choice of MOH.
Reply:U want to make your younger sister a maid ???.
Reply:Can't there be bachlorette party activities that she can attend? I think it's great that you want her to be your maid of honor and I think that you should let her plan stuff she can be involved in.
Reply:you could do something with just you and your sister, like a night out or a spa day. my maid of honor and my bridesmaids are so different i did something different with each one of them.
Reply:You just don't do the drinking thing for the bachelorette party - booze doesn't make the fun, the company and activities do!
Reply:Technically, the maid of honor is supposed to be an adult. The traditional purpose of the maid of honor is that if you become incapacitated for any reason, then she takes your vows for you. A minor cannot do that.
Also, the maid of honor is the one who is supposed to plan an host your wedding shower. That is a lot of responsibilty (and potentially $$) for a 17 year old.
I would have her be a bridesmaid and appoint someone else who is "of age".
If that is not an option, then I would ask one of your older attendents to "act" as maid of honor even though your sister will be the "technical" maid of honor. Have them include and confer with your sister but put the responsibility of everything on them. OR, as mom to oversee it. (which means she'll end up doing most of it anyway)
Also, since you have given her such an important role in your wedding, it would be kind of mean to plan wedding festivities that she cannot attend. Your bachelorette party doesn't have to be something that she cannot attend. Instead of doing something that requires you to be 21 or older, why not plan a party that she can attend. You can go out with your "over 21" crowd separately. Let her help plan a great night out. Why not have spa day with everyone as a bachelorette party? Or how about a day at the beach followed by dinner and a show or concert? Is alcohol that important that it's worth excluding your maid of honor for?
If you think that much of your sister to make her your maid of honor, you will need to make some adjustments for her. If you don't want to do that, then you need to change her to a bridesmaid.
Reply:If you go on a bachelorette party on a boat (not that expensive) I think your sis can drink!
Reply:Are you set on going clubbing. An option might be to go to somewhere like Dave %26amp; Busters or Jillians - so your sister can come as well. Or start out at someone's house around 7pm and have some fun, then head out around 10, so your sister can at least hang out for a little bit.
Reply:I think you should definitely have your sister as your maid of honor. You could have a special dinner just for the gals and then have a slumber party or something. I know that probably sounds dumb but that's what we did for my wedding. We had so much fun too. We stayed up late, talked about guys, watched old movies, and ate all night long. The next morning we all went to breakfast. It was definitely one of the most fun times I had with all the girls. It was nice to just relax before the big day. :) Good luck with it all!
Reply:Actually I was only 17 when I was my sister's maid of honor. Let her help plan your bridal shower, take her with you to try on dresses. Let her help choose the other bridesmaids dresses and accessories. Obviously I wasn't apart of any Bachlorette party type activities but i didn't mind because i was an important part of everything else.
Reply:I was a JR. Bridesmaid in my sisters wedding when I was 16...I think the rule is if they are underage, it's JR. Bridesmaid...she'll be able to go to the wedding shower, and of course the wedding and reception, but of course the bachelorette party will be off limits unless you are doing a tamer version with dinner, or girls going away to a location.
I'm sure she'll understand.
Reply:My sister is my maid of honor and she is 16. It works out great. She can't go to the batchlorrette party... but she made a great DD for those of us that could. She was and is able to help with everything else and she has done a great job at it. Do no worry about the age. Your sister will understand completely. But she will be able to be there for everything else.
Reply:Not sure on the actual question but i dont think she can be a wittness for the signing of the marriage certificate as she is underage
Reply:Well she can particpate in the bachlorette party when you guys are haning at the hotel drinking and stuff half the fun of going out is the drinking and getting ready before hand with all you girlfriends anyway. I say let her bring a friend and they can drive you to the club (DD better safe than sorry!!) and they can go back to the hotel and hang buy the pool and watch movies while you guys are out. PLus they can go out to eat wih you and all sorts of stuff. If you make a weekend out of it they could participate in everything up until its time to go clubbing.
Reply:My fiance's sister was 16 when she was in her brother's wedding. She couldn't exactly plan the bachelorette party, but she planned everything else like the shower etc. It was fine.
Reply:A good time for all can still be had even though your MOH is underage. She shouldnt be left out because of her age. It could ulimately change your relationship if you two are really close.
I have been part of many wedding events and there have been a few with an underage MOH.
In these cases 2 parties were planned. Usually it was a combined effort with the MOH and the bridesmaid. A shower was planned for the same day as the bachorette party set for later that evening. Or a wedding shower one day and the party the next night.
It still turned out great and hey they received more gifts that way. However for obivious reasons there will be things planned for those of age. But the underage MOH also planned events that did not effect the wedding festivities.
A compromise is possible.
lilac
Old maid coming through....Scuse me?
Everyone I know seems to be married or getting married I'm 27 and still unmarried. Damnnn! I'm an old made why isn't anyone picking me. Even my crush has decided to marry someone. My life is sucking really really fast. Most of these people are in their mid to early twenties. I'm in my late twenties. Yikes!!!!!
Old maid coming through....Scuse me?
Well, if you're old, then I am positively ANCIENT. At 40 years old, I am STILL single! Never had a relationship fo longer than 18 months! And I couldn't give a TOSS about being an Old Maid!!!
Some people are just BETTER on their own. Others aren't and need a partner in their lives. So stop and THINK about things as they apply to you.
WHY do you want to get married? If it is JUST because everyone else is doing it, then that is probably the wrong reason! Is your crush someone that you GENUINELY want to spend the REST of your life with, no matter WHAT happens? If so, then you need to talk to him! If not, then why settle for someone who is not good enough for you!
27 is not an old age and you could still be married - and divorced - several times in the future with little difficulty. Have you ever stopped to think WHY you are still single? I have, and I know it is because I have yet to meet someone that I could love Until Death Do Us Part at the time that we wed...
Personally, I refuse to marry unlessI mean it for life. Okay, I realise that life doesn't always work that way and that things happen, people change. So what is meant to be for life is not necessarily so. BUT I will not get marriend for MAYBE! Besides, I am HAPPY as a single person! Okay, the sex life sucks sometimes, BUT I can do what I want to and I don't have to worry about anyone else's feelings. Until this changes, I will not get married.
Instead of worrying about what is right for others, think about what is right for YOU!! If you are still desperate to get married, then maybe there is something you need to change about yourself as a person, but I cannot comment on that without more information. But if you are happy with WHO YOU ARE and are NOT happy with the men in your life, why lead yourself down a path of misery just to be like everyone else!
I hope that this helps to put things into perspective.
Jara
Reply:You're still VERY young. Don't sweat it. You'll find the right guy. Just be sweet and don't settle.
Reply:its ok. don't start worrying till your over 30.
you don't need the stress.
just start dating again and let things progress naturally
Reply:I just turned 27 this year and just last year met my husband, got married, and now we are having a baby. Believe me, it all happens very quickly. You will meet the man of your dreams when you least expect it and your life will take off and lead you places you never imagined.
Reply:god but your`e old
Reply:Don't worry. The right one just hasn't come yet. In the meantime, go out, have fun, and don't look desperate. Men love a woman who has some independence, yet is vulnerable too.
Reply:Trust me, if you were a fly on the wall of some of these couples, you would be very glad you are unattached! The grass always looks greener.., and you are not an old made, you are not even really an old Maid. When you turn 30, then you will qualify, but by then you might be comfortable enough in your own skin to be glad, or at least realize that there is no reason to feel pressure from contrived social clocks.
Reply:Look at it this way... when you get married, it will only be your first marriage :)
Reply:Fine i'll marry you, but you are 7yrs older than me.
Reply:Hey! I'm 28 and I don't have any kids and I'm not married. I'm not an old maid! lol Marriage isn't for everyone. It's not the end all be all. If you really really really want to get married, stop thinking about it. If you obsess over it, it won't happen. Most people get divorced nowadays anyway. Give your friends about 2 years and they'll be back in the single life once again. I'm not being cynical either, that's just fact. There's a whole lot more to do in life than to be a wife and mother. Most people jump into that too quickly anyway. Marriage is sacred and shouldn't be taken lightly. Hats off to anyone who can make it work.
Reply:Dont sweat it. You will find the right person in time. Lots of folks wait until their 30s to get married. it will happen. believe it.
Reply:You're not old. People are getting married to early these days anyway. (My opinion.)
Old maid coming through....Scuse me?
Well, if you're old, then I am positively ANCIENT. At 40 years old, I am STILL single! Never had a relationship fo longer than 18 months! And I couldn't give a TOSS about being an Old Maid!!!
Some people are just BETTER on their own. Others aren't and need a partner in their lives. So stop and THINK about things as they apply to you.
WHY do you want to get married? If it is JUST because everyone else is doing it, then that is probably the wrong reason! Is your crush someone that you GENUINELY want to spend the REST of your life with, no matter WHAT happens? If so, then you need to talk to him! If not, then why settle for someone who is not good enough for you!
27 is not an old age and you could still be married - and divorced - several times in the future with little difficulty. Have you ever stopped to think WHY you are still single? I have, and I know it is because I have yet to meet someone that I could love Until Death Do Us Part at the time that we wed...
Personally, I refuse to marry unlessI mean it for life. Okay, I realise that life doesn't always work that way and that things happen, people change. So what is meant to be for life is not necessarily so. BUT I will not get marriend for MAYBE! Besides, I am HAPPY as a single person! Okay, the sex life sucks sometimes, BUT I can do what I want to and I don't have to worry about anyone else's feelings. Until this changes, I will not get married.
Instead of worrying about what is right for others, think about what is right for YOU!! If you are still desperate to get married, then maybe there is something you need to change about yourself as a person, but I cannot comment on that without more information. But if you are happy with WHO YOU ARE and are NOT happy with the men in your life, why lead yourself down a path of misery just to be like everyone else!
I hope that this helps to put things into perspective.
Jara
Reply:You're still VERY young. Don't sweat it. You'll find the right guy. Just be sweet and don't settle.
Reply:its ok. don't start worrying till your over 30.
you don't need the stress.
just start dating again and let things progress naturally
Reply:I just turned 27 this year and just last year met my husband, got married, and now we are having a baby. Believe me, it all happens very quickly. You will meet the man of your dreams when you least expect it and your life will take off and lead you places you never imagined.
Reply:god but your`e old
Reply:Don't worry. The right one just hasn't come yet. In the meantime, go out, have fun, and don't look desperate. Men love a woman who has some independence, yet is vulnerable too.
Reply:Trust me, if you were a fly on the wall of some of these couples, you would be very glad you are unattached! The grass always looks greener.., and you are not an old made, you are not even really an old Maid. When you turn 30, then you will qualify, but by then you might be comfortable enough in your own skin to be glad, or at least realize that there is no reason to feel pressure from contrived social clocks.
Reply:Look at it this way... when you get married, it will only be your first marriage :)
Reply:Fine i'll marry you, but you are 7yrs older than me.
Reply:Hey! I'm 28 and I don't have any kids and I'm not married. I'm not an old maid! lol Marriage isn't for everyone. It's not the end all be all. If you really really really want to get married, stop thinking about it. If you obsess over it, it won't happen. Most people get divorced nowadays anyway. Give your friends about 2 years and they'll be back in the single life once again. I'm not being cynical either, that's just fact. There's a whole lot more to do in life than to be a wife and mother. Most people jump into that too quickly anyway. Marriage is sacred and shouldn't be taken lightly. Hats off to anyone who can make it work.
Reply:Dont sweat it. You will find the right person in time. Lots of folks wait until their 30s to get married. it will happen. believe it.
Reply:You're not old. People are getting married to early these days anyway. (My opinion.)
Is It Wrong to be a Spinster/Old Maid? (spiritual Q)?
Just curious religiously speaking is it ok these days and do people frown upon old maids who never marry?
Where there old maids in the bible?
Is It Wrong to be a Spinster/Old Maid? (spiritual Q)?
I don't think so. I'm going to be single the rest of my life and that's ok. I guess most would look at me as me an old maid. But not understand it because they say I am beautiful. How can that be? I wear a ring fire Opal ring on my married finger. The Lord is my Groom. There is no other.
Crazy, I know.
Weird, I know.
Blessed, you don't know. Hum.
Reply:No. Some people, for various reasons, choose not to marry. I have an elderly relative who is an "old maid", and I totally respect her decision. Marriage wasn't for her, and she had the good sense to know it. There's nothing wrong with deciding to never marry, or to never have children (I've made the latter choice).
Reply:I believe they were called Eunuchs, read Matthew 19:12, and no it is not wrong to be labled an old maid, as a matter of fact, it is related that God prefers your sole undivided attention, cuz when your married, you give that to your spouse!
Reply:No ma'am! God and Jesus both speak of men and woman, both living as single individuals and being a powerhouse for God should they choose! Actually, I revere anyone who has the will and want to do so. The only thing I would fear from it is when a person gets along in age, will there be anyone there for them to look after them and visa-versa?
Reply:I think unmarried women were considered prostitutes in the bible?
I hope it isn't wrong because I am 26 and unmarried and have no intention of getting married(in a church) I may marry for like tax or citizenship purposes if necessary.
Reply:Religiously speaking, the Catholic sisterhood, or nuns, are destined to all become old maids, unless you subscribe to marriage to "god". In Paganism, a crone is looked upon with great respect.
Reply:Actually, Paul encouraged singleness. He saw marriage as only necessary for people who couldn't remain celibate.
Reply:There is a "gift" of singleness!
It frees up your time to serve...The Lord!
Biblically speaking it is better...
(to serve the Lord)......................................
When your married your time is spent
on how to please each other!!!
Reply:no I do not think it is wrong
I am sure there were some unmarried women in the Bible but none jumps to mind now.
Where there old maids in the bible?
Is It Wrong to be a Spinster/Old Maid? (spiritual Q)?
I don't think so. I'm going to be single the rest of my life and that's ok. I guess most would look at me as me an old maid. But not understand it because they say I am beautiful. How can that be? I wear a ring fire Opal ring on my married finger. The Lord is my Groom. There is no other.
Crazy, I know.
Weird, I know.
Blessed, you don't know. Hum.
Reply:No. Some people, for various reasons, choose not to marry. I have an elderly relative who is an "old maid", and I totally respect her decision. Marriage wasn't for her, and she had the good sense to know it. There's nothing wrong with deciding to never marry, or to never have children (I've made the latter choice).
Reply:I believe they were called Eunuchs, read Matthew 19:12, and no it is not wrong to be labled an old maid, as a matter of fact, it is related that God prefers your sole undivided attention, cuz when your married, you give that to your spouse!
Reply:No ma'am! God and Jesus both speak of men and woman, both living as single individuals and being a powerhouse for God should they choose! Actually, I revere anyone who has the will and want to do so. The only thing I would fear from it is when a person gets along in age, will there be anyone there for them to look after them and visa-versa?
Reply:I think unmarried women were considered prostitutes in the bible?
I hope it isn't wrong because I am 26 and unmarried and have no intention of getting married(in a church) I may marry for like tax or citizenship purposes if necessary.
Reply:Religiously speaking, the Catholic sisterhood, or nuns, are destined to all become old maids, unless you subscribe to marriage to "god". In Paganism, a crone is looked upon with great respect.
Reply:Actually, Paul encouraged singleness. He saw marriage as only necessary for people who couldn't remain celibate.
Reply:There is a "gift" of singleness!
It frees up your time to serve...The Lord!
Biblically speaking it is better...
(to serve the Lord)......................................
When your married your time is spent
on how to please each other!!!
Reply:no I do not think it is wrong
I am sure there were some unmarried women in the Bible but none jumps to mind now.
If I don't become better at My Pinuckle Game will I become an Old Maid?
I bought the Movie "The Women" and one of the ladies told another lady that he would be an old maid if here Pinuckle didn't improve. I suck at Pinuckle, am I doomed? Help.
If I don't become better at My Pinuckle Game will I become an Old Maid?
No, you are a Bridge to my Hearts! Oops, wild card!
Reply:switch to maj-joon before its too late.
Reply:NO but if you dominate at Cribbage you will be an old hen. If you learn spades you will be a speckled hen, and if you beat me at charades you'll get a great big ummm... rooster.
If I don't become better at My Pinuckle Game will I become an Old Maid?
No, you are a Bridge to my Hearts! Oops, wild card!
Reply:switch to maj-joon before its too late.
Reply:NO but if you dominate at Cribbage you will be an old hen. If you learn spades you will be a speckled hen, and if you beat me at charades you'll get a great big ummm... rooster.
Is there any website where you can play card games like old maid against other users?
Old maid was my favorite card game as a kid so i was wondering if there was a site where i could play it and/or other card games against other REAL users not computers. Uproar is no longer in service so that wont work.
Is there any website where you can play card games like old maid against other users?
Uno, spades, hearts and other games can be played against real people on msn zone.
Here is the link!
http://zone.msn.com/en/root/freeonline.h...
Reply:I don't know about old maid, but you can play spades, etc. on yahoo games.
Reply:I think you can try these site :
http://www.diablo.com
http://www.warcraft.com
http://www.gamerevolution.com/
http://www.softwarearchives.com/games/in...
http://www.gamezone.com/
http://www.freegames.com/
http://www.download-game-demo.com/.........
http://www.hotgamedownloads.com/...........
http://www.games32best.com/
http://www.winpcgames.com/
http://www.amazedgames.com/
http://www.gamethat.com/
http://www.download-free-games.com/........
http://games.softpedia.com/
http://www.download.com/action/2001-2095...
http://www.terragame.com/
http://www.free-windows-games.com/.........
http://boardgames.about.com/od/freeboard... free board and card games.
http://www.games.com
network security
Is there any website where you can play card games like old maid against other users?
Uno, spades, hearts and other games can be played against real people on msn zone.
Here is the link!
http://zone.msn.com/en/root/freeonline.h...
Reply:I don't know about old maid, but you can play spades, etc. on yahoo games.
Reply:I think you can try these site :
http://www.diablo.com
http://www.warcraft.com
http://www.gamerevolution.com/
http://www.softwarearchives.com/games/in...
http://www.gamezone.com/
http://www.freegames.com/
http://www.download-game-demo.com/.........
http://www.hotgamedownloads.com/...........
http://www.games32best.com/
http://www.winpcgames.com/
http://www.amazedgames.com/
http://www.gamethat.com/
http://www.download-free-games.com/........
http://games.softpedia.com/
http://www.download.com/action/2001-2095...
http://www.terragame.com/
http://www.free-windows-games.com/.........
http://boardgames.about.com/od/freeboard... free board and card games.
http://www.games.com
network security
Would you be upset if your mother called you an old maid?
My mom keeps constantly pushing me to start thinking about settling down and getting married and have kids.... I went to visit her and out of nowhere she tells me that maybe I don't realize it but by some people's standards I would already be considered an old maid and that I seriously need to start thinking about my future if I don't want to end up alone.
I'm 23, graduating college this week, I have a great job that I start in few weeks. I'm just confused how I'm not thinking about my future?
My mom is very smart and educated herself. But she got her engineering degree at 19 and got married at 22 and had me at 23, but things are a little different for me.
How do I explain to her that we live in a different time without her getting on my back?
Would you be upset if your mother called you an old maid?
Katyusha:
I agree with everyone. The majority of my friends got married young - 19 to 23. Almost all of these marriages failed. I believe it was largely due to the fact that they had not experienced enough in life yet, including a more diverse set of people; and fittingly, cheating was the factor that broke all of them apart. Also, being financially/professionally secure is a big one, as money and career changes are some of the biggest problems in young marriages. I did not get married until I was 34. I was lucky in that I pretty much knew right away, this was a person I could and wanted to be around all the time (a very tall order for a Scorpio).
I know its a lot a pressure, as one of my friend's mother constantly bugged her about marriage, with the name-calling and all. She got married a little older than the rest of my friends - about 24-26. She was always on that quest though. And I never knew if its what she really wanted, or she just felt so much pressure. She is still married; however, her husband is a pretty dubious guy, and he expects to be waited on hand and foot.
Last, but certainly not least - Congratulations to you! Now you can focus on your professional life, while still choosing what you would like to do with your free time. You deserve and need some me time!!!
Reply:i wouldnt really be that upset, and you are not getting old at all! just because your mom rushed through her life so quickly doesnt mean you should. take your time and wait until you find the perfect person that you want to spend the rest of your life with and then get married and settle down. you are not and old maid just because you are not so quick to get married. you sound fine to me!
Reply:Hey, Katyusha (lol..its that Japanese?)
Talk about tough standards. Every person is different. Some people find love when they are 15 and some people find love when they're 40. I think it is wrong and ignorant for your mom to call you an "Old Maid". Because you are only 23.
Just tell your mom that you're focusing on your own career and that is your #1 priority. Love, marriage, and having kids comes after that. And you do have a point that you live in a different time than your mom. Dating world today seems to be more complicated than ever before. With all the sleeping around that is going on..lol.
Congratulation on your graduation. Hopefully I myself can graduate in 2 to 3 years from now.
Reply:tell your mom that you are thinking of your future and that is why you are not rushing into getting married.you are still very young and have not found the right one to spend the rest of your life with yet.you are doing right by getting your life together first keep up the good work!!
Reply:No she's always calling me names like that. Yeah it hurts, but it's not a big deal. Explain to her how you are still in college and you are ready to graduate, you have a great job, and you are thinking about your future(right?)
Reply:Tell her you've got PLENTY of time to get married and have kids. Without being rude, you might want to tell her that maybe she's being a little selfish. Sounds like she wants a baby around not for your sake, but for hers.
Reply:She sounds like she's jealous. Next time she mentions it, tell her you are adding a month to the time you will settle down every time she asks that question or gives you advice about it.
Reply:my mother calls me that all the time ;l
Reply:Your mother is crazy. You are not an old maid and you have plenty of time to get married. Tell her you want to make yourself financially secure before getting married because then if the relationship doesn't work out you will not be left out on you ear. Tell her you want to have a few years on your own in your own carreer like she did since she was 19 when she first got her degree and didn't get married until like 3 years later. Tell her getting married right now is not the best decision for you and with the way most relationships go now -a -days you want to make sure you have enough work experience to be able to live and take care of yourself before you get in a serious relationship. Tell her in order to be an old maid you would have to be old and you are still young. Tell her it hurts your feelings for her to be calling you an old maid and have so little faith in your future.
Reply:I am your mums age and trust me at that time, girls were not supposed to want to get married at all. And babies, well forget that. They spoil your figure and interfere with your career. Biology is not destiny. A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. I am woman hear me roar. Do you really think I am going to stay home and cook your dinner? I dont think I want this one (referring to the embryo) There is a real financial brain under those curls!!
Did your mum marry your dad? Was she raising you at home and not working outside the home?
Because in my opinion, your mum regrets her feminist years, perhaps wanted more children, and feels that she really wants a husband and now it is too late.
She wants you to find a stable relationship and stay home and have babies.
Reply:Hi Devochka (I can't get used to the new name just yet),
Your mom sounds kind of confusing. She lives one kind of life and wants something different for her daughter.
Well, first of all, I want to say congratulations on your upcoming graduation. What an accomplishment, and I know you worked hard for it, and I wouldn't be surprised to hear that you have some accolades or awards coming to you. Also, I wish you well in starting your career - how very exciting!
Now, regarding your age. Relatively speaking, 23 is very young. FYI, I did not marry until I was 32 and had my first child at age 37, and I am of your mother's generation, older even. I applaud you for staying focused on your work and not succumbing to maternal / peer / societal pressure.
Enjoy your single years because those are the years where you will learn the real meaning of freedom and independence. I feel sorry for girls who marry and have children too young - they never get to experience this wonderful stage of development. I also believe that many silently envy single, educated and career driven women.
Now, regarding what to tell your mom: I would very gently tell her that you want her to be proud of you and would very much like to have her support for what you want to accomplish in life. Tell her that marriage is something you want to do someday, but the time and person has to be right. You don't want to jump into marriage and the domestic lifestyle just for the sake of fulfilling some ill-conceived notion about appropriate age and then later divorce because you are not happy. She should understand that, but most importantly, I would let her know that you do have marriage on the agenda. She may feel that you have dismissed it completely.
Good luck to you.
I'm 23, graduating college this week, I have a great job that I start in few weeks. I'm just confused how I'm not thinking about my future?
My mom is very smart and educated herself. But she got her engineering degree at 19 and got married at 22 and had me at 23, but things are a little different for me.
How do I explain to her that we live in a different time without her getting on my back?
Would you be upset if your mother called you an old maid?
Katyusha:
I agree with everyone. The majority of my friends got married young - 19 to 23. Almost all of these marriages failed. I believe it was largely due to the fact that they had not experienced enough in life yet, including a more diverse set of people; and fittingly, cheating was the factor that broke all of them apart. Also, being financially/professionally secure is a big one, as money and career changes are some of the biggest problems in young marriages. I did not get married until I was 34. I was lucky in that I pretty much knew right away, this was a person I could and wanted to be around all the time (a very tall order for a Scorpio).
I know its a lot a pressure, as one of my friend's mother constantly bugged her about marriage, with the name-calling and all. She got married a little older than the rest of my friends - about 24-26. She was always on that quest though. And I never knew if its what she really wanted, or she just felt so much pressure. She is still married; however, her husband is a pretty dubious guy, and he expects to be waited on hand and foot.
Last, but certainly not least - Congratulations to you! Now you can focus on your professional life, while still choosing what you would like to do with your free time. You deserve and need some me time!!!
Reply:i wouldnt really be that upset, and you are not getting old at all! just because your mom rushed through her life so quickly doesnt mean you should. take your time and wait until you find the perfect person that you want to spend the rest of your life with and then get married and settle down. you are not and old maid just because you are not so quick to get married. you sound fine to me!
Reply:Hey, Katyusha (lol..its that Japanese?)
Talk about tough standards. Every person is different. Some people find love when they are 15 and some people find love when they're 40. I think it is wrong and ignorant for your mom to call you an "Old Maid". Because you are only 23.
Just tell your mom that you're focusing on your own career and that is your #1 priority. Love, marriage, and having kids comes after that. And you do have a point that you live in a different time than your mom. Dating world today seems to be more complicated than ever before. With all the sleeping around that is going on..lol.
Congratulation on your graduation. Hopefully I myself can graduate in 2 to 3 years from now.
Reply:tell your mom that you are thinking of your future and that is why you are not rushing into getting married.you are still very young and have not found the right one to spend the rest of your life with yet.you are doing right by getting your life together first keep up the good work!!
Reply:No she's always calling me names like that. Yeah it hurts, but it's not a big deal. Explain to her how you are still in college and you are ready to graduate, you have a great job, and you are thinking about your future(right?)
Reply:Tell her you've got PLENTY of time to get married and have kids. Without being rude, you might want to tell her that maybe she's being a little selfish. Sounds like she wants a baby around not for your sake, but for hers.
Reply:She sounds like she's jealous. Next time she mentions it, tell her you are adding a month to the time you will settle down every time she asks that question or gives you advice about it.
Reply:my mother calls me that all the time ;l
Reply:Your mother is crazy. You are not an old maid and you have plenty of time to get married. Tell her you want to make yourself financially secure before getting married because then if the relationship doesn't work out you will not be left out on you ear. Tell her you want to have a few years on your own in your own carreer like she did since she was 19 when she first got her degree and didn't get married until like 3 years later. Tell her getting married right now is not the best decision for you and with the way most relationships go now -a -days you want to make sure you have enough work experience to be able to live and take care of yourself before you get in a serious relationship. Tell her in order to be an old maid you would have to be old and you are still young. Tell her it hurts your feelings for her to be calling you an old maid and have so little faith in your future.
Reply:I am your mums age and trust me at that time, girls were not supposed to want to get married at all. And babies, well forget that. They spoil your figure and interfere with your career. Biology is not destiny. A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. I am woman hear me roar. Do you really think I am going to stay home and cook your dinner? I dont think I want this one (referring to the embryo) There is a real financial brain under those curls!!
Did your mum marry your dad? Was she raising you at home and not working outside the home?
Because in my opinion, your mum regrets her feminist years, perhaps wanted more children, and feels that she really wants a husband and now it is too late.
She wants you to find a stable relationship and stay home and have babies.
Reply:Hi Devochka (I can't get used to the new name just yet),
Your mom sounds kind of confusing. She lives one kind of life and wants something different for her daughter.
Well, first of all, I want to say congratulations on your upcoming graduation. What an accomplishment, and I know you worked hard for it, and I wouldn't be surprised to hear that you have some accolades or awards coming to you. Also, I wish you well in starting your career - how very exciting!
Now, regarding your age. Relatively speaking, 23 is very young. FYI, I did not marry until I was 32 and had my first child at age 37, and I am of your mother's generation, older even. I applaud you for staying focused on your work and not succumbing to maternal / peer / societal pressure.
Enjoy your single years because those are the years where you will learn the real meaning of freedom and independence. I feel sorry for girls who marry and have children too young - they never get to experience this wonderful stage of development. I also believe that many silently envy single, educated and career driven women.
Now, regarding what to tell your mom: I would very gently tell her that you want her to be proud of you and would very much like to have her support for what you want to accomplish in life. Tell her that marriage is something you want to do someday, but the time and person has to be right. You don't want to jump into marriage and the domestic lifestyle just for the sake of fulfilling some ill-conceived notion about appropriate age and then later divorce because you are not happy. She should understand that, but most importantly, I would let her know that you do have marriage on the agenda. She may feel that you have dismissed it completely.
Good luck to you.
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